Golden Globes Fashion Recap
I thoroughly enjoyed the Golden Globes Sunday night. Tina Fey and Amy Poehler were charmingly hilarious and I giggled with glee at their verbal shenanigans. It may have been too soon for the Bill Cosby jokes but I tipped my hat to the ever popular "who would you rather game". As for their fashion choices....well...
Its a good thing Tina Fey can charm her way through the world with her wit and sarcasm - because her red carpet dress was odd and looked like a paper lantern ready to be lit by a fire and released into the sky. I liked Amy Poehler's blue dress though, although it was slightly casual veering on boring. The pockets were a nice touch and stacks of diamonds on your wrists are always a good choice.
Here were my favorite looks of the night -
Namoi Watts (in yellow) was my MOST adored. She always looks stunning and perfectly styled. Her snake charmer necklace was risky and a little strange, but I didn't mind it! (It was probably hand sculpted out of flawless diamond powder or unicorn horns.) Amal Clooney was a close second for best dressed - but this could be because of her British accent or the fact that she won the gold medal of celebrity olympics and married George Clooney. Overall the majority of attendees looked great, and there wasn't much to scoff at. But never you fear, I managed to find a few ;)
Lupita Nyong'o is definitely getting invited to my next girls craft night - cause this girl can work a silk flower like nobody's business. Imagine what she could do with a glue gun and some glitter? If this dress is any indication of the level of artistic expression that she is capable of - we would be in for a REAL TREAT!
Here is the lovely Claire Danes in her prairie dress that she hand sewed while her ma was churning butter and her Pa was rustling cattle. Im not even sure what is going on here. Did she pick this up off the weird clearance rack at Anthropologie? Was she raised by gypsies? Does she smell like patchouli oil???
Kerry Washington? Is that you?` I almost didn't recognize her in this queen of hearts gown made out of quilted Charmin. I feel like I cant breathe looking at her corset lines squeezing the life out of her midsection. How can a gown look like it is made out of both satin AND tin foil simultaneously??? Usually she is one of my red carpet favorites.Sadly, this dress will go down in the color blocked flames of hell this week.
*No undergarments were harmed in the making of this look.
Dear Kate Hudson, I have been wearing your workout clothes from Fabletics for a year now, and my waist still looks like dough rising in a warm windowsill. I would like to know your secret to looking like you have never given birth or eaten a carbohydrate in your life. Also, what brand of tape are you using to keep your dress in place? As you must trust it a great deal. Do you and Jennifer Lopez have the same stylist?
Speaking of Jennifer Lopez...How is it that Jenny looks like she never made it off the block??? (Although I wouldn't dare say that to her face because you know she would pull out a prison shiv from her bra and cstab me with it along with scratching my eyes out with her 4 inch long fingernails.)
Its a good thing there weren't any giant moth eating birds flying overhead or we may have lost one of Hollywood's brightest young starlets: Keira Knightly. I literally have no words for this weird ruffled cocoon. Perhaps by Academy Award season she will emerge from within this tiered lace straight jacket and emerge as her actual beautiful self. Time will tell.
For some awkward reason Lana Del Ray came as "sexy grandma circa 1986" in this slinky pleated sea foam nightgown. It definitely gave me some summertime sadness.
Jennifer Aniston came as a man this year. That is all.
And here we have Miss Jessica Chastain in her delicate nightgown the color and texture of a chocolate fondue fountain. She must be shopping the same granny's closet as Lana Del Ray. The only thing missing from this look is a walker and a small yipping white lap dog with runny red eyes.
I saved the BEST for last. As I was watching the show my BFF texted me the following picture of Kristen Wiig. It perfectly put into words exactly how I was feeling about her dress:
If only she had bothered to accessorize with baby hands. I would have given her white cowboy wedding dress two very tiny awkward thumbs up.
I hope you enjoyed this year's Golden Globes as much as I did!!! Its like the appetizers to the Oscars and I am so excited to see all the fashion hits and misses in the upcoming months. There are some EXCELLENT films being shown right now ( Boyhood, Cake, Wild, The Imitation game, Foxhole, The Theory of everything...to name a few). Leave a comment and tell me your favorite looks of the night or films of the season!!
First time I’ve read ur blog…..and I would have to say that instead of focusing on the dresses you didn’t like it would’ve been nice to see the dresses that u did approve of….I understand this is all a matter of your opinion but I believe that we should spend our energy in positive ways…..not to shame some peoples choices in fashion…just sayin’ ….?
LOVED your recap!!!
Never miss it!
Hilarious as always! I loved Jennifer annistons man of the year! What is that, a cummerbund around her waist? You have officially forced me out of my lazy inability to fill out my name and email in order to write a comment! 2 tiny thumbs up Christy! P.S. Your boneless buffalo wings recipe made my pregnant mouth water, let’s make that next week and dip it in my nacho cheese
P.S.S I posted this comment on another random blog post because I’m terribly technologically challenged
All in all, I thought the night provided very little fashion inspiration. However, I LOVED Emma Stone in her gorgeous pant suit. And when I saw Kiera Knightly all I could think was, “Oh dear…someone’s stylist will no longer have a job tomorrow.”